The ARDS Foundation - Body, Mind, & Spirit

By Pastor Ian

“Things Are Not Quite What They Seem: “

 There was a person who prided himself on being exceedingly punctual. He followed a very precise routine every morning. His alarm would go off at 6.30.am.

He rose briskly, shaved, showered, ate his breakfast, brushed his teeth, picked up his briefcase, got into his car, drove to the nearby ferry landing, parked his car, rode the ferry across to the downtown business area, got off the ferry, walked smartly to his building, marched to the elevator, rode to the seventeenth floor, hung up his coat, opened his briefcase, spread his papers out on his desk, and sat down in his chair at precisely 8.00 a.m. Not 8.01 or even 7.59 a.m. ALWAYS at 8.00 a.m. He followed this same routine without variation for eight years……..until

One morning his alarm did not go off and he slept fifteen minutes late. When he did awake, he was panic stricken. He rushed through his shower, nicked himself when he shaved, gulped down his breakfast, only halfway brushed his teeth, grabbed up his briefcase, jumped into his car, sped to the ferry landing, jumped out of his car, and looked for the ferry. There it was, out in the water a few feet from the dock. He said to himself, “I think I can make it,” and he ran down the dock towards the ferry at full speed. Reaching the edge of the pier he gave an enormous leap out over the water and miraculously landed with a loud thud on the deck of the ferry.

The captain rushed down to make sure he was all right and then said, “Man, that was a tremendous leap, but if you had just waited another minute we would have reached the dock and you could have walked on.”

What is the moral of this silly story? In our own lives we are prone to take ‘knee-jerk’ actions to things which happen to us unexpectedly; things that take us out of our routines, and very few of us have the life-skills to handle the new situation smoothly, as if everything was as it always is. We do not like change in our lives and we plump for routine and sameness…no nasty surprises. I wonder about this because it creates all the elements of making our lives boring and wasting the gift we have been given, all for the sake of safety and continuity.

Change, when it happens can be exciting, and we should take a shot at embracing the unexpected and running with it for a while, allowing ourselves to be tested with new situations. Whether we succeed or fail under these circumstances is not the point. It is simply doing the very best we can, and who knows, perhaps in the process we will find areas of ourselves we never knew existed.

Remember, we cannot discover new oceans unless we have the courage to lose sight of the shore. A friend of mine sent me this and it speaks well to what I am saying:

"Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming...'Wow! What a ride!"

“WHEN WHITE IS BLACK!”

There is a story told of a long-suffering woman who tried very hard to please her ultra critical husband, but failed regularly. It was always, it seemed, at breakfast that he was at his worst. If the eggs were scrambled, he wanted them poached; if they were poached, he wanted them scrambled. One morning, with what she thought was a stroke of genius, the wife poached one egg and scrambled the other and placed the plate before him. Anxiously she awaited what surely this time would be his unqualified approval. He peered down at his plate and snorted, “Can’t you do anything right, woman? You’ve scrambled the wrong one!”

(I wonder if he lived to hear his alarm ringing the next morning?)

Can you imagine going through life with an attitude like this? Now we all know people who are almost exactly like this; people who call black…. White; open…. Closed; good…. Bad; who say no when YES is the correct answer; who speak out when silence is called for; people who are so wrapped up in themselves that they are insensitive to the feelings of others. People who live their lives like this leave a trail of sadness and destruction behind them, and are, for the most part, unaware of how they affect others. If we make an effort to understand what is going on in their lives, and why they live with an attitude like this, we might often find that there has been some event in their dim and distant past that has caused their attitude and behavior to change. There is no quick fix, and much patience and love is called for if change is to come about. So the next time you come across someone with an attitude like a bear with a sore head, let them have their say and then add “It is interesting (Mary/John…or whatever their name is….people love to be recognized by name) that you said that. It would help me to understand you better if you would explain WHY you feel that way.”

Don’t get discouraged with a put-off…keep at it, and every time they make an outrageous or inappropriate comment get right in there and ask…….”I am trying to understand your attitude on this issue Mary/John, please help me by explaining how you feel this way.” Give it a good old college try and who knows, you may be able to help this person to turn the corner and bring some light and smiles, some warmth and love back into their lives.

“Gaining Perspective.”

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar...and the coffee...
A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "YES!"
The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed. "Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things - God, family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favorite passions - things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car. The sand is everything else-the small stuff. "If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups.  Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18 holes of golf. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.”

It is only when disaster suddenly strikes our lives that we seem to have a sudden revelation; an awakening to what ‘might have been….to what should have been done…..to things unfinished.’ A burst of understanding saying that we have wasted so many precious hours, days, weeks and even years in pursuits that bought us no happiness and simply loaded up our lives with problems, conflict, things of questionable value etc etc… The time we have is a gift from God and that is why we call it “The Present Day!” Each day we waken is ALL we have (believe me when I say this to you because I, and my ARDS survivors friends, are all to painfully aware of the truth of this) so make the most of it and live it with a smile on your face

and love in your heart……. And when you say to someone “Have a Great Day….” say it now with new feeling and understanding and you really will give that person a gift to carry through the day.

“HAVE A GREAT SUMMER”

Pastor Ian.

"Choice, not chance, determines destiny."

A sales rep, an administration clerk and the company manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a genie comes out in a puff of smoke. The genie says, "I only grant 3 wishes, so you may each have one."

"Me first, me first!" says the administration clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world."
POOF! She's gone.

In astonishment, "Me next, me next!" says the sales rep. " I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseusse, an endless supply of pina coladas and the love of my life."
POOF! He's gone.

"OK, you're up," the genie says to the manager.
The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."

Moral of the Story: Always let your boss have the first say.

Why do you have to "put your two cents in"...when it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going? ☺

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